I Surrender**

**Thank you SO very much to Nancy at Be Not Afraid for sharing this. She is such an incredible example to me as a Godly wife and mom and to see that she struggles in the same ways that I do, is a huge relief to me. So, I want to share them, if not for any other reason than to remind me that she is human as well and experiences the same emotions that I do in the day to day as a wife and mom. **

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More often than not these days, I feel pulled in SO many directions. . . between the Home Schooling. Being a good and Godly wife and mother. Trying to take care of a house while still dealing with my own issues. Just the day to day. . . I feel like I just want to throw my hands up and scream. I feel like I want to run and hide. I feel like I have had enough.

No sooner do those feelings pass and I feel guilty for experiencing this as I am SO incredibly lucky. I have a spouse who adores me and will do anything for me. I have 3 incredible kiddos who, although test me, I love with every ounce of myself. I have it all. . . but then why do I feel this way?

Then, before I know it, the cycle restarts. It is mentally and physically exhausting. My continued prayer for myself, is that I can accept the day to day and not stress or feel overburdened. To be okay with whatever the result is as long as I know that I tried my best. To know that there is such a thing as criticism that is not meant to hurt, rather just help and improve. To not be as sensitive. Hopefully this 'I Surrender' study can help me with all of that!

Anyhow, here are her words. I look forward to starting this - maybe I can get my married sisters in MS or my sister-in-laws here to join me on this project. . .


From Nancy:

There have been times in the life of my marriage and motherhood where I have felt extremely empty. It's as though I have given and given and given to the point where there is just nothing left. Actually, if I'm truly honest, it isn't so much that I've given, given, given....it's more like it's been taken, taken, taken. Do any of you know what I mean? Is this making any sense? Sometimes it seems as though I have nothing left to give or offer. I'm at my wits end and close to the point of packing my bags and taking a long vacation....somewhere without husbands, kids or responsibilities.

I know that part of the problem is that in the midst of all the chaos, I have not left any room for God. He has been pushed outside of my line of sight, along with the laundry and the tufts of dog hair that roll along the kitchen floor as I rush by. Something is missing. Something is definitely missing!

As I've been eagerly waiting my copy of Judy Dudich's book " I Surrender...", I've been drawn to a passage that I read when she first published her E-book sometime ago.....

"If we are to be a house that serves the Lord, then we must begin by joyfully serving each other! We must surrender our own desires and our own needs to ask God to fill us instead, with a desire to show our family how much they are loved and appreciated."

Today, there are no other words more appropriate for me! Imagine that, allowing God to "fill me" instead of running on empty constantly, or, expecting my husband or children to fill up the space in me that is meant for God alone.

My goal for this wonderful month of November (along with remember loved ones who have died) is to look to God to fill me up rather than looking to my family to fill the needs that only HE can fill. I'm going to concentrate on surrendering to the Holy Will of God all those areas of my life that belong to Him.

If you are on Facebook, look for Judy's "I Surrender" Book Club. We will start reading Chapter One in the next week or so and then discussing it together! I really need this right now. How about you?