Distance is hard. . .

Our First *Little* House

When we moved here from Jackson, MS 6 years ago, it was not a decision that was made lightly. We had a new baby. We had just bought a house a year prior. I had NEVER been away from my family, even in college, my sister was there with me! But, it was God's plan. Our fabulous realtor sold our house in a matter of HOURS. Robert was offered a great job that moved us and paid for ALL expenses. God was showing us that this is what we needed to do, so we did.

Clare and I - March 2005

Upon moving here, where Robert is from, we made friends. Bought a house. Found an incredible, one of a kind doctor. Everything just fell into place. It was an adjustment of course, but it was not too bad. The homesickness that I had anticipated was really just not there. I liked life here. Things were good.

We would return to MS every so often, and they would travel here, and at first that was great. But as time wore on, my siblings grew up - They experienced life and made memories that did not include me. When my older and younger sister became engaged, everybody was present. . . except me. I was not able to see my little brother graduate elementary school or my bigger little brother graduate college. I missed out on the bonding. I am not able to talk to my mama face to face or tell my papa to come get his grandchildren before I go crazy. There is just so much.

Robert and Mama Gerry! (May 2010)

Most of the time, I am not bothered. Much like, I do not feel homesick until we visit 'home.' But lately, with all of the death that is surrounding people that I know, I am feeling it. Maybe it is because we are not able to talk anymore. Everybody has their own crazy schedule with work, school, husbands, sports, plays, etc etc that the last thing they want to do is get stuck on the phone catching up - and I understand that. Completely understand that.

The Bride and her Nephew (March 2010)

 Missing all that I am missing out on. All that my kiddos are missing out in. Missing all of the inside jokes that I used to be apart of. Missing just the day to day. My little brother swims on the JV swim team. Who knew? So much that I am unaware of that normally does not phase me, but lately is really eating at me.

I also think that a part of me is scared that something will happen and I will not have had the opportunity to have spoken to them, regardless of my attempts.  Especially with the deaths that have occured completely unexpected lately. I am scared. I am sad. I am worried that an opportunity has been missed.

Maybe one day we will all be together again and I can share in all of the ups and downs that come with a large family. But until then, I love each of you and miss you dearly. If you get a spare moment, I would love to hear from you! XOXOXOXO

All 14 of us: Little Robert, Bret, Rachael, Mama, Joseph, Michael holding Hannah, Will and Clare (Bride and Groom), Mollie, Papa, Me, Daddy, Wesley --> 6 of the 9 children present, 3 spouses, 3 grandkids!  (April 2011)